Last night I saw a television commercial for a Valentine’s Day furniture sale and the canopy bed in the spot reminded me of a moment from my childhood. Ya’ll know that I’m an only child, right? My dad and mom were my best friends growing up. I was Daddy’s little girl (then and now) and we went to great lengths to make my mother nutty. *lol* We were truly partners in crime. Somebody ate mommy’s last few PF Goldfish crackers? I blamed Daddy TDJ, he blamed me. Mama TDJ growled at us both. Ah, the good times.
On the eve of my 10th birthday, I returned home from my godmother’s house to find my bedroom transformed into a room fit for a princess! The photos below pretty much capture it. Replace the purple in picture #1 with pink and you’ll see my dream room. Picture #2 is a little bigger, but picture #1 is a little more authentically 1986. The only thing missing is a small white table with 3 white chairs and white bookshelf.
Ya’ll, when I saw my room, I went crazy! Hugging and kissing my parents, jumping on the bed, sitting at the table and pulling my Cabbage Patch Kids off the shelves to sit with me, etc. I was overjoyed!!
Fast forward about one month. Not much has changed. I’m still in love with my room. It’s a Saturday morning, so my mom has been at the hairdresser since the crack of dawn and won’t be home until midnight (if she’s lucky!). Dad and I are doing our normal Saturday stuff. He make pancakes while I color at the kitchen table. That’s when the idea was presented.
DaddyTDJ: Yes pumpkin?
Me: Clouds look really soft. Like a whole bunch of cotton balls put together.
DaddyTDJ: Well, you can’t touch clouds, but I guess if you could, they’d probably be really soft.
Me: You know what else looks soft Daddy?
DaddyTDJ: What’s that pumpkin?
Me: The top of my canopy. I had a dream that I slept up there once.
**DaddyTDJ stops flipping pancakes to look at me. Now that I’m older, I know that look. But back then, nope, had no clue. To this day, my father claims that while yes, he has a look, he did NOT give it to me or instigate this idea at all**
DaddyTDJ: Um, well babygirl, it might be but the top isn’t for sleeping. It’s just for decoration.
Me: To just look pretty?
Me: Oh. **dejected**
DaddyTDJ: Aww, don’t be upset pumpkin. Your bed is made for a princess and it’s soft as can be. Keep dreaming about the clouds and sleeping on your canopy.
Me: Ok Daddy.
Fast forward a few hours. Daddy and I have eaten breakfast, cleaned up the kitchen, taken the dog for a walk and he’s listened to me practice piano. He went outside to wash and wax our Datsun, and I headed to my room to play. So, while sitting at my little table and having tea with all my Cabbage Patch Kid friends, I knew that I just had to get on top of that canopy. My plan was forming and there was no turning back.
I quickly changed from my play clothes into a pair of pajamas. I grabbed my favorite Barbie doll and one pillow from the bed. I didn’t grab a sheet or blanket. Seems strange now, but at the time, I must have thought that pajamas, Barbie and the pillow were sufficient for a nap. Anyways, I slid one of my little wooden chairs over to the 2 drawer nightstand. With one foot on the nightstand and one in the chair, I tossed Barbie and the pillow on top of the canopy. The nightstand rocked a little, so I reevaluated the wisdom of standing completely on it. Although I was only 10, I was a very solid girl. Not fat yet, but definitely not the wispy type, ya dig? I glanced over at the five drawer tall dresser and concluded that it would be stronger than the nightstand. Ya know, taller and stronger are the same, aren’t they?????
I dragged my chair to the other side of the room. In the pic above, I actually had a tall book-case between the bed and that tall dresser. So, I was able to do some type of monkey climb, pull/tug, shimmy manuever between the bookshelf and dresser to get myself into a position that would allow me to launch myself on top of the canopy. Stop laughing!! Anyways, with a smiling face and an excited mind, I catapulted myself on top of my canopy bed. Yes, the flimsy canopy that was made of, oh I don’t know, organza and tulle, perhaps? Supported on four sides, by, hmm, let’s say giant plastic straws? Yep, sent my body flying and just knew that in seconds, I would be relaxing comfortably upon the softest place on earth. **smh**
Well, even an idiot can kinda guess where the story goes next. I went sailing right through the center of that oh so soft fabric canopy. Now, I’m sure I would have gotten the lesson loud and clear at that point, but the story doesn’t end there. Oh no. Too easy! Remember, my bed is brand new and oh so very springy. Since I had so much momentum from my jump, I bounce off the bed, sail across the room and fly head first into this:
Yep, old school radiator! Ouch!!! And my final resting place? In the corner, atop a pile of rubble that I later figured out was my very unlucky little white table along with one equally unlucky chair, my favorite Cabbage Patch girl Lisa and her Cabbage Patch Pony Herman.
I was battered and bruised! I still have a scar in the center of my forehead as a result of this little misadventure. After making sure I wasn’t dead, my father had a good laugh at my expense. And because his sense of humor is wicked, he refused to touch the destruction in my bedroom until my mother got home. And being equally as wicked and comical, they had me re-intact everything to the best of my ability. Just evil! To this day, I blame my father. *lol* I think that if he had just shut down my ideas completely instead of telling me to keep dreaming, I never would have tried it!
I know I’m not the only one that has done something this silly! What have ya’ll done? Did you think you were invisible? Thought you could fly? Come one, spill it!