All my life, I’ve thought that the purpose of a fence was to outline/frame the perimeter of a property, keep animals in or out of said property, or to beautify the above-mentioned property. Well folks, after the nonsense that went on in my neighborhood last night, I now realize that the purpose of our fence was to save that turqoise Le Sabre circa 1996/1997 from crashing through the wall of our living room.
This was the scene this morning, after the dust had settled. Last night, at exactly 8:58pm, Mr. TDJ and I were home playing with Little Man when we heard the biggest crash, followed by Mr. TDJ’s car alarm going off. My reflexes are quicker than his and I was out the front door in 30 seconds flat. I looked left, then right and saw nothing. I walked to the edge of the front porch and was stunned speechless for a good 5 seconds. Those that know me realize that for me to stunned speechless, some serious ish has to be happening. In my driveway/back yard, is an old school Buick LeSabre. Ya’ll, we don’t own a Buick LeSabre.
As I’m trying to process my missing fence and newly acquired vehicle, I watch a man exit from the passenger front seat, make eye contact with me and run off down the street. WTH?? I look back at the car and the driver is still sitting behind the wheel. The interior overhead light is on, so I can see his face clearly. He’s struggling and wiggling all around, either pinned from the crash or having a hell of a time with his seatbelt.
My mind has already processed this scene as either a stolen car, carjacking, robbery or some variation of the three. Just in case the dude behind the wheel had a weapon, I bounced myself back into the house to call 9-1-1. Mr. TDJ rolled outside to check things out when I briefed him while waiting for the 9-1-1 operator to pickup. Yeah, I said waiting. In Prince George’s County, MD, sometimes you wait when calling in reference to an emergency. I hope I don’t ever REALLY need emergency assistance.
By the time Mr. TDJ gets outside, the driver has disappeared, leaving the keys in the ignition, car running, doors flung open and my fence in pieces. All of my neighbors come out while I’m in the window talking to to 9-1-1. The police do actually arrive quickly (Yeah, Town of Seat Pleasant Police!! – Boo, Prince George’s County Police!!) and realize that one of the suspects is down the street, injured, hiding behind a bush. A bush? Seriously dude, a bush? Hmph, not a shock that you stole a Buick LeSabre.
The detectives questioned me and I gave them a A+ description of the perps. Based on my details, they asked me what my occupation was. Mr. TDJ yells from the other room, “Nosey neighbor! That’s her job!” Ya’ll see why I don’t like him? *lol* Anyway, my daddy is a police officer and your girl doesn’t play when it comes to details. Plus, the writer in me notices everything.
Thankfully there is no damage to our home, but as you can see the fence took a beating. Please, please, please in the future, tell your cousins to carjack better cars and keep them off my street!